Ground Beef , Earthly Body

Didn’t sleep well due to an attack of the spousal snores, so dream recall was all messed up... only memory is a sense of inferiority, that I don’t measure up, that I don’t count as much, that I don’t deserve as much, that I’m too slow, too weak, too timid...

While still in the twilight of my mind, my body told me that I ought to get up and continue where I left off yesterday with the food issue. (also need to work on why I keep having amorous dreams, and my feeling of inferiority having to do with my separateness)

So, the cooked ground beef not on a plate from yesterday... lots of cheap and cheerful food to feed the masses... it’s nothing fancy but can satisfy the majority of palates... my palate is a bit different though... is that why I suddenly had the idea a few days ago to make a stirfry with ground beef, which is not the usual stirfry ingredient? It turned out to be to my liking as I had a feeling it would... is this about trying things that I normally wouldn’t’ even think of because of preconceived beliefs (that stirfrys are made with ‘whole’ meats)? Hmmmm, ground meat is pre-broken down into smaller units... are these all different layers of meaning that I need to discern? Yes.

Ok, ground beef – coarser, more down-to-earth, no-nonsense and simple nourishment for the body (material plane) – what I need after a fairly steady diet of ‘higher’ food for the mind and spirit, which isn’t a bad thing but for my tendency to neglect the earthly body. Even though I am much better with body care than I used to be, my focus and energy go mostly to the emotional and above still. I need to be more engaged with my body and the earth and the material, this I’ve known for some time, but how to make it happen? Ask my body to help me. Aside from lying on the ground more, going down to the lake and walking around the parkland, I am also learning and appreciating more the works of artists who work with elements of nature (Maya Lin, and Andy Goldsworthy, see photo above), I am caring for my plants and feel quite a bit of affection for them (this coming from someone who killed plants for decades), my retreat out on the land at the Fire (and river, rain, sun, storm, thunder, wind, plants, animals... I will be posting about this experience soon on my other blog: http://resonatetohealing.blogspot.com/), but more is needed...

Yoga nidra is lying on the ground! I could learn it and do it out in the park or on the beach! **order CD today.

Something else: a session of shamanic doctoring with Jeannette, and tell her I need to be on the ground.

Another thing: this has come up before... Zen, the kind that Natalie Goldberg practices – look it up.

One more: Travel abroad – the opportunity will come to me for the end of the year – wait for it – it’ll be a kind of pilgrimage.